things that i liked about today

amazing food

great company

WATCH THE THRONE on my ipod

sunshinesunshinesunshine

a lovely outfit

bubble o' bill

ahhhhh so content.

the hardest thing is that i can still feel you
i can still remember what you liked
where your skin felt the most smooth
how your lips felt like between mine

you were such a great kisser

such a great lover

great boyfriend

i could give you goosebumps
you could make me tremble

every day i feel you
every fucking day
and i know you don't feel me
or miss me
or want me

too good to be true
but it was true
for a while
and that while was beautiful
i do not regret it
but it wasn't enough

maybe i feel too much
speak too much
think too much
love too much

so much of me wants you to read this
because of that glimmer of hope
but you won't, i know you won't

i just miss you all the time.

the good outweighs the bad and the love outweighs the hate.

i know that it's going to take time but i really just want to feel better now.

one second i'm fine.

next second i cry.

next second the thought of anyone else makes me sick.

next second i hate everything.

next second I want you to just regret it all and call me.

next second i stalk all the boys i want to pash.

then i think up a million different sneaky plans to get you back.

but you've never changed your mind before. and i'm not special enough to an exception.

such a fucking cliche, the first heartbreak is the hardest.

i have so many things i want to ask you, so many things i want you to think about, so many things that i should have said when it happened. but my tears stole my courage and my voice.

i feel sicksaddesperateangryheartbrokenconfusedsadsadsadsadsad.

i wish i could hate you.

i'm so not ready for this.

i feel like crying i feel like i miss you i feel crazy i feel irrational i feel like there is no one to talk to i feel like talking to everyone i feel like talking to no one i feel like being hugged i feel like being left alone i feel like crying i feel like singing i feel like creating i feel like destroying i feel like crying i feel like kissing you i feel like an idiot i feel like shit. i feel like i need something.